How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
