You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
