Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize