watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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