i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
