you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
