I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
