It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
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