and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
i just google imaged poop.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
