I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
You were trust falling into bushes
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
