i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Randomize
