i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
