i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
