spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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