He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
