How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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