My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
