She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
She bit a glass in half.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Randomize
