i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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