its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
