this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
