WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
