is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Randomize