I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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