Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Randomize