we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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