why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
