WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
