dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
either way he was missing a nipple.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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