Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
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