Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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