last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize