stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
