I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
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