he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Randomize
