that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
