$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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