yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
