I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
