Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Randomize
