Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize