Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
she looked like the before picture.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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