why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize