she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
