I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Randomize
