and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
