At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
