I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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