i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Randomize
