I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
